Upon marriage, meals became more than meat and potatoes as the bar was set unreachably high by my mother-in-law and her sisters. Box potatoes were fine at my house, not so at my in-laws. Pepto-Bismol was a side dish at our house, not so at my in-laws. Heaping helpings were offered at my house, while my in-laws ate like birds. When I dated my husband, I came home and ate a second dinner just to meet my caloric intake for the day.
I willingly accepted the challenge of creating delicious and nutritious homemade meals for my husband and soon after for our family of six. But this was no easy taskwhile working outside the home. With five picky eaters (four of whom were children), it was nearly impossible to please everyone. To this day, no one agrees on the type of pasta to have with my spaghetti sauce. One time, I made chili three different ways - one with meat only, one with meat and beans, and one with meat, beans, and peppers. And yet, I willingly and happily used the extra pots or pans to please my family.
My time, energy, and extra effort paid off, because when I recently asked my grown children what they enjoyed most about the holidays, it was unanimous: my delicious cooking. Well done, Momma.
Transforming Mealtimes: Connection, Competition, and Cherished Memories
It wasn’t until I worked in a retirement village that I understood the power of food and mealtimes. Many of our family meals were rushed because of activities and just a routine part of life, butfor some senior adults, mealtime became their only socialization. Ergo, I began to look at food differently.
At that time, my daughter and I enjoyed Food Network, our favorites were the cooking competitions. When I was the Activities Director at the facility, I organized various food contests that were blue ribbon worthy. Those women and men baked and cooked (two separate talents) and took great pride in sharing their favorite dish. I never could have imagined the impact those friendly competitions would have. It gave them something to look forward to, a challenge, and an opportunity to socialize and reminisce while preparing the dish.The unique ingredients, family history with some recipes dating back 100 years, and fond memories that came along with these special events satiated much more than my stomach.
Food is more than fuel, and meals are more than consumption. It’s the gathering together at one table, the conversations, the love that goes into the preparation and purpose of nurturing another human,and the delightful silence of when everyone is enjoying the fruits of the labor. One of my favorite movies is “Ratatouille.”Specifically, the scene when the cranky old food critic takes his first bite of ratatouille and is immediately transported to when he was a child coming in from the cold, his mother smiling as she sets the piping hot dish on the table before him.
It was food and cooking that opened the door for Julia Child’s career as one of the most famous French Chefs of all time.In 1948, she was an American living in France and struggling with the language and meeting people, so she took cooking classes to find a social circle. That worked out very well.She went on to publish 20 books, had an extensive television career offering cooking classes, and becamean advocate for food, education, and research.
I tried one of her dishes. Once. It was a red wine beef stew. The steps were like a grand staircase. Do this, then put it aside, mix this with that, put that in another dish, brown this, put it in another bowl. I used every bowl in the house and followed the recipe and instructions as best I could. The result was extraordinarily delicious! But I didn’t do it again. I need a recipe with as few ingredients and steps as possible. I am fine with homemade, but let’s be practical.
Recently, my daughter and I had the privilege of seeing a Julia Child exhibit at the Cincinnati Museum Center. It detailed her life from childhood through the end of her career and how much she wanted to serve in the military in WWII, but at 6’2” she was too tall to qualify. She then became a part of the Office of Strategic Services (OSS). She was an ordinary woman, who loved her husband, wanted a career, needed a social circle, and created the opportunity via cooking classes and became a legend as a chef, author, and TV personality.
She was a driver of change! Thanks to her, regular people began cooking like award winning chefs and learning how to pair any dish with a fine French wine.
My best friends in the kitchen over the years have been my crockpot and any recipe that I can put everything in all at once, cook, and forget. Although, I do believe I make a mean beef brisket, delizioso spaghetti sauce and meatballs, killer cream cheese potatoes, and to-die-for Christmas cookies. If someone were to ask.
Now that the children are grown and some have flown, and I am asked, “What’s for dinner?” The request both grates on my nerves and reminds me meals make memories. Joyful are the special occasions, but that daily expectation of creating dinner…stick a fork in me, I’m done!
